I've had alot of things in my life that have left me with feelings of helplesness but, none I can think of is greater than a friend hurting/in need. I don't know what to say to help that friend...It's perfectly obvious there are issues but I'm not eloquent enough nor feel with all the fuck ups in my life that I'm qualified to give advise...I try to sometimes liken some of this friends feelings to mine but, I'm reminded that we are talking about friend and not me...I love this friend unconditionally...Would share and do share,anything and everything in my life...Seems I just don't understand...What parts I do understand and comment on, it's just not the right comments I feel...Our lives are so completely different, it's amazing that we became friends in the first place...Maybe it's because in the past I have hurt this friend but God knows, I really didn't do it intentionally...It was at a time when I clearly was thinking only of myself and an easy way out...In the time that we were apart I felt we lost something...I went around with my head in my ass and friend developed new or stronger friendships that I as a grown woman, find myself sometimes jealous of....Friend is on a roller coaster and I don't know how to stop it....When Michael died I knew exactly what had to be done...I took charge and done it...If memory serves me, friend and I have had only one strong dis-agreement and parted shortly which killed my heart but, I knew I had to go on...I know friend doesn't always agree with what I say nor my actions but, one thing right off the bat was, friend allowed me to be me....Friend would/does advise me from time to time and I usually heed friends advise...Sometimes I really don't want to but, I know friend is only looking out for me... I wish I could return that favor...I love you from my heart friend...I wish I weren't so helpless to your plights..I wish I could offer you advise that would bring some light to your life, as you have mine...I will FOREVER be here for you...I hope you know this...I just want to say in closeing, I'm worried about you...I love you...