The Not So Silent Killer

You just had to come take her from me didn't you?? This little gal that grew up with nothing and decided she was ok living that way....

She asked for so little in this life... Gave so much... Came from a long line of alcoholics and stayed with the program herself until you made my sweet sister so sick she couldn't drink anymore...I thank you for that....I prayed so many times that something would stop her from drinking, stop her from looking and behaving like the mother we were given.. but did it have to be YOU??? Did you have to take that little thing and make her swell up and puke so violently??
She never experienced a drunken puke fest like the one you put her on...

You ravage so many people in your path.

She was simple....
She was accepting of her little trailer with all the pictures of her kids on the walls.... She loved collecting any and all Disney VCR tapes.... That girl could decorate her trailer for Halloween better than any mall...

Seems funny that she could put away so much bologna when she was healthy cause that's about all we had to eat when we were kids....I couldn't force myself to eat bologna as an adult for a long time because of that...

She was simple...

She enjoyed her fish tanks all over that little trailer...I couldn't walk in there that she wouldn't make me go home with something she had bought from the dollar store or somewhere.... She had five children that just couldn't comprehend what the hell was happening.... I tried telling Tina once, " your mom doesn't have the flu, this is something she isn't going to get over" .... That was about the time that Tina had offered for some reason to was some blankets for Sharon and wouldn't bring them back....Had Sharon in a tizzy ....All I wanted was for comfort of EVERY KIND to come to my precious sis...
I once told her that I would crawl inside her body if I could...And I meant it... Sharon and I were so totally different...Sharon lived her adult life just like we were raised and raised her children that way too but I didn't love her any less....She pissed me off to the max sometime but I loved that sweet thing...
As if you tearing through her body wasn't enough there had to be that fire that burned everything she owned to the ground...Just a month before she died....Lost everything....All the simple things she cared so much about.... Every Damned thing...
I had never been that close to a fire of that magnitude and emotion in my life and I pray I never will again but I can still see myself running down that street, past the fire trucks....around the corner, not knowing if she had been killed in that fire or not and, there she was....Sitting in that wheelchair ...So small, so fragile... She didn't want to leave that trailer park that night but I finally talked her into coming to my house... The next day, we went back....News crews were there....The smell...Oh My God, the smell....The gutted out trailer that had once been the shrine of my sister was gone....All the things she held dear to her heart....GONE...I still see her sifting through burned ashes....Looking for anything she can familiarize herself with....News camera in her face....News men asking questions... Sharon bent over, looking at something....picked it up...Her whole precious little body shook as she showed me a charm bracelet, or what was left of one that her kids had all pitched in and got her with little booties on it representing her grandchildren....All melted together...Could barely make it out but, she knew.... I miss you sis and your simple ways.... Although you were 4 years younger than me you were older than me in so many ways....I chose not to live like we were raised and at times I was miserable....You knew what the score was....You weren't miserable....You were one of the strongest people in this world that I know of and I am honored to be your sister....Please save a place for me next to you so we can one day sit and talk again....